Jacob de Berker’s Unheard Songbook Gets to See the Light in New EP
Jacob de Berker was a man who had a strong connection with music his whole life. His passion for folk music led him to play in several shows and tour cities of different countries. Unfortunately, two years ago, just when he was ready to take his career to the next step, he passed away due to Epilepsy before seeing his music reach listeners worldwide.
During his last years, Jacob immersed himself in the recording of many songs, but all of these songs remained unreleased. After listening to his records, his mother and his sibling-in-law understood that the beauty of his songwriting and the sincerity of his music had to be shared. Their first decision was to release a moving EP, which will be followed by much more music.
Their intention is not only to share and celebrate Jacob’s talent but also to raise awareness about SUDEP, the sudden, unexpected death of someone with epilepsy, who was otherwise healthy. That is why all the earnings from his EP will be donated to SUDEP Action. In an exclusive interview, we had the opportunity to discuss Jacob and his music with his mother. Through his music and his family's efforts, Jacob de Berker's legacy will live on, inspiring others and advocating for a better understanding of epilepsy.
Can you tell us a bit about Jacob's childhood? How was his relationship with music as he grew up?
Jacob was the middle child of 5. There was a great deal of singing and music in our home. I played the piano and flute and had been an artist before having children. Jacob’s dad played the guitar and ran his own tree surgery business, after studying languages at university. We were quite a bohemian, creative, and noisy bunch. We had no TV and it was before computers, so it was a very active household, with everyone learning how to cook, and doing jobs around the house too. When Jacob was 2, we moved to a bigger house in the countryside, a beautiful, rural location in S.W England. It had an acre of land and was down a narrow, country lane, so we could collect blackberries, hear birdsong, see the sun rise and set, and a dark sky full of stars. Jacob always had a vivid imagination and really loved this time in his life. He was a confident and exuberant child interested in everything and always had a wicked sense of fun. I feel the freedom he had in childhood surrounded by the natural world had a big effect on him.
We always read to the children at bedtime or invented stories. This was followed by a song or two after lights out. Traditional British folk songs were the ones Jacob constantly asked for, as well as poetry. Thinking about this now, and how he used to stand listening to me singing, playing classical as well as folk songs and ballads, ones which told stories of love and heartache, about the countryside and hardships, makes me realize that this probably had a strong influence on his formative musical sensibility. He had a phenomenal memory for words and music from an early age and was a highly impressionable and sensitive child despite his love of mischief and daredevil antics.
Jacob learned the violin at age 4 (Suzuki style) but it was his first electric guitar at 15 that became his favourite instrument. He had a few months of guitar lessons at the beginning, learning to play covers of bands he liked, like Oasis. He moved on to acoustic and then banjo later. He started composing his own songs from the very beginning. We still have these early notebooks with his chord indications. To sing and play his guitar was real soul food for him.
What were some of his musical influences? What kind of artists or songs remind you of him?
As a very young boy, he loved to dance to Elvis Presley and the Beatles. As a young teenager, he moved on to Led Zepplin, Muse, Radiohead, and System of a Down. He listened voraciously to many sorts of music, classical, folk, jazz, and world music and his elder brother who was a drummer introduced him to Rap and Hip-Hop too. He came to love Nick Drake, Bon Iver, and Bower Birds and listened to my Joni Mitchell and James Taylor albums too. Sufjan Stevens is another artist he liked and This is the Kit. He also loved Eric Satie’s Gymnopedie, Elgar’s cello concerto as well as Tchaikovsky, Debussy, and J. S. Bach. Towards the end of his life, he became interested and experimented with electronic, atmospheric music and listened to people like Nicholas Jaar, John Hopkins, and Christian Loffler. He’d carefully put together playlists for people and you can really see his wide-ranging love of so many different genres in these.
For me, his music and story-telling lyrics come down through the long stream of the folk tradition in the UK. He didn’t listen much to folk music but it was in his bones; the telling of a tale and the soft singing with acoustic guitar is something he did all his life. It always went straight to my heart, hearing him sing and play his new songs, hearing him through an open door, or from the garden, swinging on the hammock. I think Nick Drake is probably the artist that most reminds me of him, and it’s the folk songs I used to sing and play to him as a young boy that remind me of him too.
When was the moment when you realized that Jacob was destined to become a musician?
Jacob was very able as a child and found so many subjects interesting. He was good at crafts, even making his own guitar at his Waldorf school, artistic as well as scientific. He found it hard to choose which direction he wanted to go for some time. He tried out several career paths before he concentrated entirely on music: Art foundation year in Stroud; music course at BIMM in Brighton; and Osteopathy MA in Maidstone where he made many lifelong friends and performed and wrote songs whilst studying, but he didn’t really want to practice as an osteopath. Music was his first love and he increasingly found he could only give expression to his deep feelings in this way. He was in his mid-twenties when he took the plunge and committed himself to a life as a musician. He was at his happiest when either listening or watching musicians play music with friends, or when at a small intimate venue where he could play and people listened to him. It was when he moved to London in 2010 that his songwriting really took off. This EP has 5 songs that span the time from Brighton, Maidstone, and the beginning of his London period.
As Jacob pursued music more seriously, how did you support him as he balanced his passion with other aspects of life?
He struggled with the lack of money but learned to live frugally. He became vegetarian and was a great cook, practiced yoga, and went to the gym regularly. We did help him out financially at times, but he was fiercely independent and never asked for handouts from us. He hated the amount of time he had to do bar/café jobs to make ends meet which had long hours and sapped him of energy to compose and perform. It also made his insomnia worse. However, he did meet many new friends in London and went to music festivals during the UK summers with them. Festivals were the highlight of his year. He craved the company and loving support of friends and didn’t like being too solitary. He longed to have a permanent relationship with a girl, but he seemed to have a fatal attraction to the wrong ones, which left him heartbroken. He had a lot of faithful friends who loved him dearly, and he enjoyed coming home to be with his big family, now with extra nieces and nephews.
We could see he struggled with depression and frustration and that his career and personal relationships were not where he had hoped they would be, yet he was uncompromising in staying utterly true to himself. We admired him so much for that. I think home was a safe place for him, but he so wanted to be able to rely on his music-making for his income and to make ends meet a little more comfortably. He felt increasingly that he was running out of time, despite our encouragement to the contrary. I think we phoned and kept him in the family loop a lot once he left home. When he had his 30th birthday we bought him a flight to New York to stay with his younger sister. Her partner, also a musician, had arranged for him to play in various venues there and Jacob planned to go back when the Covid-19 pandemic struck. This was a very difficult time for him. He’d established a songwriting circle in Amsterdam and was the events organizer for open mic nights too. Both here and London previously he met a large group of diverse musicians, who were all devastated when they heard he had died.
When it comes to the album, how does it transmit Jacob’s essence? Additionally, we would love to know which track from the album is your personal favourite.
The EP brought out in October ’23 is just the first of a whole lot more releases that we hope to bring out. I think his songs are really beautiful, diverse, imaginative, inventive, and authentic. His lyrics, like Bob Dylan, or Leonard Cohen’s speak to one’s soul. Jacob was a very deep and old soul. He once commented to a friend that he thought he was a “pessimistic optimist who hoped for the best while expecting the worst.” There are only a few you might dance to. They are poetic, romantic, and full of sensitivity and true musicianship. They take you to another world, of love, sadness, and searching. I feel his songs reveal what it is to be human, to feel like you live under a shadow at times yet also a beauty of connection with people, nature, and the elements that can help you transcend your sorrows. I feel we need people who can bring a mirror up to the way in which we behave towards each other and how we often damage another’s heart for our own gain. Many of his friends talk of how his songs reflect his acute perception of the world that they too recognize. He truly was a man of the heart, speaking truthfully about his experience of living in a confusing world.
It’s so hard to choose a favourite from this EP. “Drinking Song” has got a great drive to it. I saw him perform this live in Bristol and everyone really got up and danced to this one. “Move” has Jacob in a fatalistic, floating along the river of life mood. It’s a theme he develops over the years in a beautiful way, and I love the rippling banjo in it, the new instrument we gave him when he was in his 20s. “Butterfly Nets” is about looking back on his childhood and home. It’s so poetic and full of Jacob-style imagery and imagination. This has to be one of my favourites. In “No Captain” I love Hieronymus Bosch's “Ship of Fools” imagination here. Jacob had a wicked sense of humor and had a very British way of finding things hilarious when disaster struck. One of his childhood friends has even had the words “No Captain” tattooed on his arm. “Daffodils”, well who wouldn’t fall in love with this song? This maybe this has to be my favourite. It touches me so deeply every time I listen to it. It has all the big, loving heart that was Jacob and the sad, un-requited honesty of him too.
What motivated you and your family to make the decision to release his music?
Jacob was rather a perfectionist which means he procrastinated releasing his work, always thinking it wasn’t quite finished. I just want people to hear him, and give time for his words and melodies to sink in. I felt, especially when I and an old school friend of his unearthed many songs we hadn’t heard before on his laptop, that they needed to reach a wider audience. This together with his poetry revealed how he had worked quietly away for 20 years as a true artist, honing his use of words and melodic form. I was stunned by some of the music he had created and became determined to finish the work he couldn’t complete. It became my own personal way of staying close to him and being of service to him now he had left us. He lacked the confidence and belief in his work that he needed to promote and sell it himself. I think creative people often suffer from this inability to promote themselves. I wish I had had the right connections for him whilst he was alive, but the least I can do now is to facilitate his work being heard by a wider audience in the way it deserves. He’d just ran out of time. My youngest daughter’s partner offered to release this first EP and market it. It was already in EP form and Jacob had put it on other streams, but this was a bigger promotion. It’s because of this that Rival got in touch with me, so I’m very grateful. for your interest in his music.
We would love to hear more about how this decision to share his music has impacted your family, and any challenges or successes you have experienced along the way.
Well, I’m not sure if the decision to share Jacob’s music has really impacted the family, not yet anyway. I think that his sudden death has in some way paralyzed us all in different ways. It was such a terrible shock and it is still so very recent. We’re in the early stages of grief and nothing prepares you for such a loss. It’s so complex and intense to lose someone so young and so close to you. There’s no right or wrong way to grieve, so it might just be my own, personal way of channeling my sadness. It has really been my own idea, venture, and motivation, and not the families to promote and gather Jacob’s work together. I just don’t want him to disappear and be forgotten. My husband has backed me throughout this process but finds it still too painful to listen to Jacob’s recordings.
I think what’s happened so far is that the many people who knew and loved Jacob now listen to his music and cherish it all the more now he’s gone. I find I do too, and I love listening to him and watching the videos of him performing. You can value him for the true artist that he was as well as the kind and caring person that he was too. I’m determined to get the unheard material out there. I hope that then there will be a bigger impact. It’s strange that although Jacob won’t be here to materially benefit from any success this release might have, I feel it will make a difference to him, on the other side, to have more recognition. There are at least 50 songs worth releasing, and I am working with another musician on 3 songbooks for voice, guitar, piano, and banjo so that others can play his songs. I’ve already published a book “Quiet Love” which is his collected lyrics, poetry, and other writings. I think he would be very pleased with how this turned out. I hope I can do the same with releasing his music and Songbooks too.
Can you explain why SUDEP was chosen as the beneficiary for the EP's proceeds?
I don’t want to materially benefit from Jacob’s work. Sadly it was only after Jacob died that we heard about SUDEP, (Sudden Unexpected Death from Epilepsy ). They offered instant support for us at that terrible time, and do so for free for the millions of people who lose someone they love in this way every day. It only exists due to donations at present. Epilepsy is incredibly common. There are over 60 different types. It’s in the top 10 causes of death in the under 35’s, yet nobody talks about it. It's estimated that about 1 in every 100 people will have epilepsy at some point in their lives and 65 million people suffer from it globally already. Some forms start in childhood. Others, like Jacob’s, develop in mid-late puberty. It can be brought on by a virus infection or injury too. It still has stigma and taboo surrounding it, and in many countries, (shamefully the UK and the USA) there is NO government funding for research still! That’s my main reason to make SUDEP the beneficiary of Jacob’s work.
Around half of epilepsy sufferers die of SUDEP. It’s one of the many neurological conditions like migraine or Parkinson's that so many people suffer from. Epilepsy research is at least 15 years behind all other medical research for comparable, common illnesses. Parents and teachers need to know about epilepsy. It commonly brings with it anxiety, depression, insomnia, and feelings of lack of self-worth in a previously stable and confident child. Night seizures that the person is unaware of are also part of the epileptic picture. The root cause is still not understood. The drugs only suppress and don’t cure the condition and can also make sufferers very ill with vomiting, headaches, nightmares, and steep mood swings. Teachers should treat epileptic students with much more care. They are usually sensitive and vulnerable young people who meet with problems of exclusion and insensitivity due to people’s lack of understanding and often experience problems finding employment as they get older. It should be discussed so that no one is in the dark anymore. Children too need to be encouraged to be empathetic to those who have this condition and tell their parents if they have any strange symptoms.
What impact do you hope Jacob's music will have on listeners who are unfamiliar with him?
The EP brought out in October 2023 was just the first in a whole lot more albums that we hope to release bit by bit. I think his songs are really beautiful, diverse, imaginative, inventive, and authentic. His lyrics, like Bob Dylan, or Leonard Cohen are deep and speak to one’s soul. There are only a few you might dance to, the others are poetic, romantic, and full of sensitivity and true musicianship and take you to another world. I feel his songs reveal what it is to be human, to feel like you live under a shadow at times yet also a beauty of connection with people, nature, and the elements that can help us transcend our sorrows. I hope it will inspire other musicians to write from their hearts and be their authentic selves. I feel we need people who can bring a mirror up to the way in which we behave towards each other and how we often damage another’s heart for our own gain. Many of his friends talk of how his songs reflect his acute perception of the world that they too recognize. He truly was a man of the heart speaking truthfully about his experience of living in an often confusing and difficult world. I’d just like people to truly hear him.
Finally, what message do you have for families that are affected by a chronic condition?
Look online and get informed about epilepsy from an accredited source. You are bound to know someone who is, or might become epileptic. Maybe you yourself. Make sure you know what the signs are, and contact SUDEPAction online to discuss them. They really don’t mind if it’s a false alarm and they offer their expertise for free. The signs can be as slight as a child looking a bit day-dreamy, or feeling a bit fuzzy, or they might have a seizure at night and not know why they are so tired and fragile the next day. SUDEP was set up by 5 moms who had lost loved ones 30 years ago, and now it’s a worldwide movement. It needs government funding if it’s to really help find the root cause for this stealer of young lives. I’m sure that in the future, we will be horrified that in parts of the world, epilepsy was still seen as someone being possessed by the devil, and that no progress has really been made since 4,000 BC as to why it occurs in the first place.
You need to go straight to a specialist to find what is the latest possible treatment for your child or yourself. It’s very easy to feel overwhelmed by a prognosis such as epilepsy. Most types are unlikely to go away, so finding groups of other people in the same boat who are sympathetic and can support you can help alleviate some of the panic that sets in. Young Epilepsy and SUDEP Action provide this support for free. I wish we had known about these organizations from the outset of Jacob’s diagnosis.